More and more, couples are wavering from tradition, even when it comes to who pays
for the various wedding vendors and items other items. If, however, you are looking for
some guidelines on who traditionally pays the bills, this list may be just what you need.

Tips on Tradition & Expenses

Options to consider include 1) dividing all expenses evenly between families, 2) dividing costs arrangements (ie: bride's family pays for flowers, catering and music while the groom's family pays for the rehearsal dinner, transportation, and photography), and 3) dividing wedding and reception costs based on guest apportionment (ie: if 60% of the guests are invited by the groom's family, then the groom's family pays 60% of the cost).  Other items, such as the bride's attire and attendant gifts, can follow tradition.

After committing to be married, the couple should first tell the Bride's parents, then the Groom's parents, then immediate family and friends.  The Groom's mother, following etiquette, should then initiate contact with the Bride's family and express her happiness of the coming nuptials.  Traditionally, the Groom's mother should also request a luncheon or introduction meeting if the Bride's and Groom's families are not acquainted.

The Groom's parents are responsible for hosting the rehearsal dinner.  Everyone who takes part in the wedding ceremony should be invited, including the flower girl and ring bearer.  Etiquette also mandates that the spouses, significant others, and the parents of the flower girl and ring bearer also be invited.

The Mothers of the Bride and Groom should provide guest lists as soon as possible after the announcement of your coming nuptials is made.

The formal attire of the Father of the Groom should match that of the Father of the Bride.

After the selection of the Bride's and Bridesmaids' gowns are made, the Bride should request several small swatches of the material.  These swatches may be necessary for purposes of shoe-dying, flower selection, and limousine accessories.

The Bride's mother should select a dress for her daughter's wedding first.  The Groom's mother should then select a dress of complimentary style and color.

The Best Man's responsibilities include hosting a bachelor party; assisting in formal wear arrangements for groomsmen; discreetly delivering gratuity envelopes to the officiant, alter helpers, ceremony soloist/musician, etc...; getting the Groom to the ceremony on time; overseeing the Ushers and seating at the ceremony venue; caring for the Bride's wedding ring and handing it to the Groom during the ceremony; delivering the first toast at the reception; making guest introductions at the reception; and ensuring that the Bride and Groom have transportation from the reception to the wedding night venue.  The Best Man should also see that all groomsmens'' formal wear is returned (if rented) after the wedding day.

The responsibilities of the Maid/Matron of Honor include hosting a bachelorette party (with the Bridesmaids); hosting a wedding shower (with the Bridesmaids); keeping track of guests' gifts at the shower; assist Bride in selecting Bridal Attendant's gowns (with or without Bridesmaids); organize fittings and pick-up or delivery of gowns; assisting in the organization and timing of photographers, videographers, delivery of floral arrangements and Bridesmaids' bouquets, transportation, etc... on wedding day; accompanying the Bride to salon appointment on the wedding day; attending to the Bride's train during the ceremony; caring for the Bride's wedding ring and handing it to the Groom during the ceremony; making a toast after the Best Man at the reception (optional); ensuring that all guest have signed the guestbook and have had their picture taken at the reception; (with the Best Man) ensuring that the Bride and Groom have transportation from the reception to the wedding night venue; and caring for the Bride's gown after the reception (if the Bride can not do it herself).  The Maid/Matron of Honor should also see that all incidentals are arranged for on the wedding day; packing a small bag complete with hair pins, hair care products, nail care products, tissues, hosiery, sewing needles/thread, make-up, socks, slippers, etc... and arranging for its delivery to the reception venue is essential.

Reservations for out-of-town guests are the responsibility of the Mothers of the Bride and Groom, respectively.  When reserving hotel accommodations, considerations for guests who smoke (if smoking rooms are available) and handicapped guests should be made.

Guests are responsible only for personal travel & lodging expenses and gift for the newlywed couple.